Have you just been friend zoned? Are you trying to figure out how to react in order to get the girl you like to want you too? Don’t worry, I have all you need to know in order to get out of the “zone”.
Here’s how the story usually goes: You meet a great girl, you’re nice, you say all the right things, you are attentive and caring, and you treat her right. Yet, somehow, some way, she just isn’t into you. You’ve been friend zoned.
What went wrong?
There’s a thousand things that could have made your relationship go from potential to pal, but instead of analyzing what happened, let’s figure out what to do from here.
The hard truth is something wasn’t right for you to become friend zoned.
Women are all different and they all have different needs. Some women need their men to be strong and secure, others like their men to be a little softer and malleable. I can’t tell you what your girl wants, but I can tell you how to react to being her “friend”.
Don’t Whine About It
No matter what kind of man your woman likes, I guarantee that she does not like a whiner. That’s right, no whining. If you start whining at her for not going out with you, or begging her to be your girl, then she’s going to step all over you. You will lose her if you whine at her. Man-up and deal with this with class.
Don’t lose your temper, don’t pout or act like she’s the worst human on the planet for turning down your advances. You have to be cool. You have to pretend it didn’t affect you. I know, it’s not easy is it? Trying to ignore your trampled heart is much tougher than it sounds (I’ve been there, guy), but you’ve got to play it cool and act as if she’s right and you’re completely fine. If you break down now she will always remember you as that weak man who broke down and you will be forever in the friend zone.
Start Dating Other People
Date other people. This serves two purposes. First, it shows her that you’re were not hurt by her turn down, and second it shows her that you’re a desirable match. They say men like competition, but women do too. If she sees you with another woman, she’s going to wonder why she didn’t look at you that way.
You know, I’m willing to bet that you were always there for her. No matter what time day or night, you were willing, even eager, to be at her doorstep with whatever she wished for. That’s a great thing for a friend, but if you’re trying to get out of the friend zone, then you need to make yourself a little sparser. Be there for her when she really needs you, of course, but don’t be at her beck and call. Show her that she doesn’t own you, and that you have a life outside of her, and she will want you back!
Show Her What She’s Missing
Of course, you need to show her what she’s missing, too. Now that you have other women to date, don’t be your usual casual comfortable (sloppy) self. You need to dress for success. You don’t have to wear a suit and tie, but you need to comb your hair, put on a little cologne, and be presentable. Wear clean clothes (not three day old jeans) and show a little style. After all, you have to look like someone she would want to date, not someone who slept on her couch.
Still be a Nice Guy
No matter what you do, don’t stop being who you really are! You know that nice guy you are? She loves that about you. Being a friend is a special thing, and the best relationships are those with someone who is your best friend.
Also, if you start being a jerk now she’s going to completely forget your entire relationship. She won’t be your friend, you won’t get to see her or hang out with her, and you’ll just be another jerk in her book. Don’t be that guy. Be you.
Give Her Breathing Room
She’s probably having a few feelings of her own about you confessing your love and her having to friend zone you, so give her a little bit of room to breathe. If she says she needs time to think, give her time to think. Smile when you see her, say hi of you think it’s okay, but wait and let her calm down before coming back into her life.
Be the Guy She Wants to be Around
I know you feel sad and depressed, but don’t be that guy. She really needs you to be happy as always. In fact, you need to be the happy guy for yourself. Happiness is a magnet and you’ll find that not only will she want to be around you, but others will want to be around you as well when you’re happy. Be happy and be upbeat, don’t be a downer.
Wait a While and Try Again
My last piece of advice to you when you’ve been friend zoned is to wait a while and try again. The length of time to wait is definitely based on the individual, but don’t move in with this too fast. It could take months, it could take years, but if you still love her then you’ll have to try again. Your relationship will be different after the first time she friend zones you, if you take my advice you could become closer together. You deserve to give it one more try when you think she might be ready to see you as more than a friend.
If she doesn’t, then be thankful you’re still a friend. I can tell you that I love and cherish my male friends more than anything because they are always the ones who make me feel safe, beautiful, and loved. Boyfriends may come and go, but a friend is forever. You’re more important to her than you could ever imagine.