Is He Into You? 10 Red Flags to Watch Out For


Are you wondering if your guy is having doubts? Have you been questioning his feelings towards you lately? If so, then here are some of the signs that he’s just not into you.

I can’t think of anyone who hasn’t been in this situation before. You know the one, when you care about a guy but he doesn’t care about you in return? It’s never a fun role to be in. But how do you know if he’s just “in a mood” or if he’s actually disinterested? Where is the line between “he’s trying to decide” and “he’s not that into you”?

Believe it or not, there is a line. Of course, it’s a very thin line between those two scenarios, but the line still exists. If you’ve been asking yourself if perhaps he’s just not that into you, then here are some of the red flags you need to watch out for.

His Texts Are Short

Okay, I’ll admit it, some men just don’t like to text. That’s okay. However, if you send a long emotionally thought out message to your guy and he replies with some monosyllable word, then he probably isn’t that into you.

Even when a man is busy, if you send him something important he will have something to say back. It might be, “honey, I’m in a meeting, I’ll call you ASAP”, but you’ll get SOMETHING pertinent in response to your text.

He Cancels Your Plans

Once in a while, things come up and you have to cancel your plans. I’ve had to do it, dates have done it to me…that’s life, and life happens. However, is you’re dating a guy who is always happy to do whatever HE planned with you, but always cancels the plans YOU wanted to do, then he’s not that into you.

In fact, you should dump this guy right now, he’s a jerk.

He Makes Excuses Why He Didn’t Call

A man who is interested will call. There’s no question about it, he’ll call. It might take him a while because he’s terrified, but he’ll call. I just call a text from a man I gave my number to two weeks ago. I honestly wasn’t expecting his text, and I’m hesitating to seriously date him because he texted me and did not call (it’s not a good sign). Regardless of anything else, if a guy is interested he’ll call.

You Are Never First

If you find yourself trying to capture your man’s attention, then you’re not on his mind. If he chooses to hang out with the guys over you, rearranges your plans to drink with his buddies, or if you have to practically bolt him indoors to spend an evening alone with him, then he’s probably not that into you. Make a note here, ladies, if it happens to be the season of his favorite sport (AKA football season or soccer season), then this does not apply to your man. There are exceptions to just about every rule of proper male etiquette when it comes to televised sports.

Your Feelings Are Always Discounted

I dated a guy who always told me “you care too much” or “you shouldn’t be so upset about that” whenever he felt as if I were acting too emotional. Remember, you’re human. If you are dating a guy who downplays your feelings or discounts your emotions, then he doesn’t care enough about you to really listen to how you feel. That means he doesn’t care enough about you for you to stay in this relationship. Never pretend to feel something different than what you’re feeling, you’ll end up miserable.

He Seems Bored All the Time

If you’re with a guy who seems genuinely bored all the time, the he’s not that into you. Let me be the first to say that a man who is interested in you will linger on every single word you say, will be happy to go to whatever show you want to drag him off to (or at least not complain too much), and will WANT to be in your company. Constant boredom is a bad sign.

You Argue Constantly

There are times when you’re in a relationship that you don’t really want to be in, but you’re too scared or nervous to actually end the relationship. When that happens, you fight. You will pick a fight over anything from the texture of the pasta your partner cooked for you to how annoying it is when they snore. It’s human nature, really.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a behavior I approve of (and really, adults should behavior much better than this), but it’s a way to get the other person to get so sick of you that THEY break it off. If you’re man is constantly picking an argument with you, then he might not be that into you.

He Won’t Look at You

Any man who loves the woman he’s with will look at her when they’re talking. He’ll look at her when she doesn’t even know he’s looking at her, he’ll want to watch her constantly. Love does that to a person. If your guy won’t look at you when you’re having a conversation (good or bad) and doesn’t seem to ever make eye contact with you, then he’s definitely not into you.

He Looks at Other Women

In combination of above, if he doesn’t look at you, but he does look at other women, then he’s not into you. Not even a little.

Now, before you freak out, there are those occasions where you’ll catch your man looking at another woman. That happens. I tell you if a good looking guy happens to be jogging shirtless while I’m walking down the street, you better believe I look (although I try not to when I’m with a boyfriend…it still happens).

Ogling every woman he sees, or checking every woman out, is a very bad thing and he’s not that into you. However, if he very seldom has a wondering eye over a beautiful woman…that can’t really be helped. Laugh that one off and move on, it’s not a big deal.

There’s Never a Set Date

If he says “we’ll have to do that sometime” or “maybe I’ll see you sometime later this week” every time you’re trying to make plans, then he’s just not that into you. No set date means he doesn’t care enough to see you, and in the even you’re dating this guy (or any of the guys above) you should cut your losses now and move on, woman. There’s another guy waiting who WILL be into you!

About Author

This page was created to encourage men and women to love more consciously; with courage, with hope, with your head as well as your heart. It’s love advice that doesn’t sugarcoat; it’s brutal, it’s honest, it’s raw. In a fast changing society, the need to know who you are and what you want are even more crucial to finding and keeping love.

Leave A Reply